Finding strength in vulnerability

When you first hear the word "vulnerability", there are likely to be several negative connotations that come to mind. The word is closely related to shame, fear of rejection and grief which, to many, justifies a want to conceal vulnerability as much as possible. But what if your vulnerability could be used as a strength?

Reframing the perception of vulnerability

Vulnerability is a part of all of our lives, whether we like it or not. Many of us learn that the best way to defend ourselves against it is to master the art of denial; pretending that we don’t care about situations or that we never wanted that promotion anyway. This guarded approach prevents us from reaching our full potential, or worse, it can cause us to internalise our failures and develop habits of self-blame. It can be difficult to approach, but how do you feel once you have asked for help?

Actions as simple as sitting down with a close friend to talk through a problem or sharing workload with a colleague give us a sense of clarity and reprieve. If emotions are not properly processed and addressed, they can increase stress levels, lower our self-esteem and create a sense of disconnection and distrust with those around us.

“To make yourself vulnerable is to show your strength.” - Criss Jami

Trust and collaboration building blocks

If we’re constantly guarded and afraid of showing emotion, it makes it impossible to be our authentic selves. Our vulnerabilities are part of who we are. Accepting difficult emotions and working through them will allow us to better react to challenging situations and recover from setbacks quicker, meaning there’s more time for feelings of joy, excitement and fulfilment! Developing this skill not only affords us a greater degree of freedom, but it also improves our empathy for others.

Empathy is a key aspect of leadership and when we talk about vulnerability. It isn’t just about showing raw emotions; we should still be cautious of oversharing in certain situations. Being vulnerable is more about self-awareness and observing opportunities to connect with others in a way that builds the relationship and fosters trust. Being more self-aware improves both communication and compassionate listening which are both key to working collaboratively. Research shows that more compassionate leaders perform better and cultivate more loyalty and engagement within teams. In difficult times, approaching any problem with compassion, transparency and vulnerability will build a strong foundation of trust amongst your colleagues.

When there is a strong culture of trust in an organisation, it's much easier to put ourselves in vulnerable situations. Examples of these could be talking about our failures or taking a chance which may lead to rejection - to reach our full potential, we must be willing to take risks! These opportunities are a great way to build confidence and resilience; they give us the chance to learn from feedback, come back stronger, and allow others to learn from our mistakes.

“When you shut down vulnerability, you shut down opportunity” – Dr Brene Brown

When observed in these ways, vulnerability is a source of empowerment. It allows us to be authentic and develop our empathy, compassion, self-awareness, confidence and resilience which are key qualities of an excellent leader. Of course, we all have flaws and moments of weakness, but sometimes we get so wrapped up in concealing them that we forget that there is a strength in embracing these. After all, they are what allow us to grow and be understood by those around us.